Ed: Hey Winry wanna hear a chemistry joke
Winry:
Ed: . . .Is that a no?
Winryy: Oh sorry, were you expecting a reaction?
Ed:
Ed: I’m so in love with you.
honestly the fact that Ed is officially ranked as a major never reached its full potential for humor (or angst, honestly, depending on how you use it)
Mustang HAS to put Ed in charge and Team Mustang just kind of….goes with it. They all KNOW they’re mostly just humoring the kid, but ED doesn’t know that, and he is so damn smug about it the whole time. He sits in Roy’s chair and does about 10 different impressions of him until he gets bored. He tries to prop his feet up on the desk but the chair isn’t quite tall enough for him to do it comfortably, so he ends up sitting in a ridiculously uncomfortable position just for spite.
Of course he doesn’t REALLY have full jurisdiction over Mustang’s office, but no one really told ED that, and for the most part Team Mustang just carries all his orders out while trying not to laugh.
Alphonse is so appalled the whole time, though. “Brother, I don’t think you should tell them to do that! Brother, that’s rude. Brother, please transmute the colonel’s desk back to normal, the gargoyles and spikes are kind of tacky.”
there’s some brilliant post about how goshdarn beautiful Ed is – how years after the Promised Day kids learn about the Fullmetal Alchemist, the savior of Amestris, and open their textbooks to find this beautiful 16 year old. 50% of the class doodles hearts on their textbook. kids write self-insert historical fanfiction about dating him. the teacher isn’t sure why everyone’s so into this lesson, but they’re happy everyone’s paying attention
and when they grow up?? like kudos to Winry for snatching that up because you know Ed grows up looking even mORE GORGEOUS. and as he mellows out a little with age and isn’t the screaming, irrational teenage boy he used to be (at least for the most part) he breaks hearts left and right on his travels. people curse the fact that he’s clearly in love and faithful – or just too oblivious to pick up on the fact that the innkeeper’s son, who’s been bringing him free treats treats throughout his stay, has a crush the size of Amestris on him.
and Alphonse??? good lord that boy grows up pretty. combine that with his impeccable manners, his incredible fashion sense, and his angelic smile and everyone he meets falls just a little in love with him. boy has flings throughout the East. Amestrian clothing lines keep seeking him out trying to get him to model for them.
I imagine Alphonse KNOWS he looks good and embraces it completely with Damn Good Fashion, while Ed never quite loses his terrible style, still dresses like someone who doesn’t really know how clothes work, and is completely, 100% oblivious to the fact that he’s attractive and other people can see it. why’d that lady buy him a drink?? who knows. not Ed.
they’re both such completely different kinds of good looking tho like ed is all scruffy and carelessly hot, he forgets to shave half the time, his clothes are always kind of messy even once he stops dressing like a hot topic ad, he’s always got ink on his hands from writing stuff in his research journals (and occasionally on his face if he’s been REALLY into what he’s doing, but he’s got a good smile and the stubble suits him. he always falls asleep on the train but then gets up and leaves still looking good. he’s just like carelessly messily handsome. and you’re totally right that he never realizes he’s hot, he just thinks like “wow people are nice to travelers in this town!” you’re being hit on ed. they’re hitting on you.
meanwhile al is like….Put Together. al always does his hair, he never leaves the house without a tie, he like actually cares for his clothes, like he irons them and shit. i once had a friend who, when we went on trips, spent the first fifteen minutes in any hotel just hanging up and ironing his clothes and like that’s al, tbh. al is also in this grey area of knowing he’s hot and being perfectly willing to use that to his advantage but LOOKING so sweet and kind that everyone else around him assumes that he would NEVER use that to his advantage. so al is like putting on a smile and charming some poor hapless librarian to let him into the rare books room without permission so he can do some research and yet everyone in the room including the librarian is like “wow………i’d give him my firstborn child” without realizing he’s actively trying to charm them
DON’T BE SORRY THIS IS PERFECT THESE ARE SOME A++ ADDITIONS! this is EXACTLY how I picture them, but you articulated it better
Edward has NO IDEA he’s attractive and that reflects in how he dresses himself but that actually makes him 10 TIMES MORE ATTRACTIVE and he is baffled, just utterly baffled why everyone keeps giving him free things and trying to spend time with him. he just wants to research why are all these people being so nice to him what is happening (he tells Al all about all these nice people he met abroad and wow other countries sure are welcoming to travelers and Alphonse is appalled. he’s just like….this is my brilliant genius older brother. this dumbass. they’re hitting on you, Edward.)
and ALPHONSE!!! YES!! Alphonse is attractive and he knows it and he is not above using his looks and his charm to get what he wants – but he’s so sweet and polite no one even realizes what he’s doing. he’s never going to use it to hurt anyone or be mean, of course, but look. he really needs to see those rare books on chimeras and he’ll do what he needs to, even if that means seducing every single librarian he meets.
the idea of them going on a journey together when they’re grown up and after they’ve spent some time growing up apart from each other is just SO GOOD. Alphonse is so embarrassed by how oblivious his brother is. Edward is so horrified by how seductive his sweet innocent little brother has become.
and like. all Al did was compliment the innkeeper a bit to get them a discount and use That Smile™ and Edward’s treating it like his brother started taking off his clothes right then and there (”HOW COULD YOU BE SO SCANDALOUS??” “what are you talking about.”)
part of a style-imitating crossover assignment from last quarter! i always thought ed would be more likely to pull this than to just be bugged by the philosopher’s stone part
FMA appreciation life 